Don't like ISA, baliklah!

Don't try to be funny! We will kick you Pakatan supporters out, then you know

1,500 rally to defend Malay rights, ISA

Protesters in Penang today called on Malay rulers to revoke the citizenship (but then what? I think we should give them an island like Pulau Jerjak and deport them there) of Malaysians who dispute Malay special rights and demanded safeguards to their special position as enshrined in the constitution.

That's right, don't like ISA? Then go back to India and fast like Gandhi, no one cares in India or go back to China and try your luck at the criminal justice system there. Who cares if you are born in Malaysia and have lived here your entire lives, you're still not Malaysian you goddamm ungrateful pendatangs.

I admit I have to subscribe to the "enemy" news organisation Malaysiakini just because some things aren't reported otherwise.

Many teenagers (hey?! where are your parents?) at the gathering carried banners with slogans written in both Malay and Jawi such as 'Kesabaran Melayu Ada Batas' (Malays' Patience Has Limits), 'Jangan Hina Nabi Muhammad SAW' (Don't Insult Nabi Muhammad), 'Jangan Pertikaikan ISA' (Don't Dispute ISA). 'Kekebalan Raja Raja Dipertahankan' (Defend the Royal Immunity) (is this a subtle anti-UMNO message, hmmmm?), and 'Jangan Pertikaikan Hak Orang Melayu' (Don't Dispute Malay Rights).

Other banners included 'Melayu dan Mamak Bersatu' (United Malays and Indian Muslims) and 'Jangan Ulang 13 Mei' (Don't Repeat May 13).

I am already preparing for the next May 13, drive these pendatangs to the sea. I already book the big LCD tv my neighbour got. If lucky, I can also rampas his car.

Not wrong to ask for Money

Eh? A long time member like myself am surprised that UMNo has an ethics code. Whatfor?

We are the chosen one's, so we should ask and therefore receive.

We ask for position, land, cars, money and we get.

It has never been a crime to ask

Latest Offer - Join UMNO and get free land

“Dia juga dapat tanah beratus ekar daripada kerajaan Barisan Nasional dahulu tetapi masih tidak bersyukur. Bila dikenakan tindakan disiplin dia bukan main marah lagi,” katanya ketika dihubungi Agendadaily.

Muhammad Taib, who is one oversexed (likes to get married in Thailand) and ballsy politician (this guy is  a saint, he is going straight to heaven when he dies), bitching about ungrateful traitors to UMNO.

Listen, the deal is, we give you land and you should be eternally grateful to us, UMNO, forever.

Goddammit, Zahar, you can't simply suddenly get a conscience and decide to do something that is in the national interest.

Join PAS, you loser, who needs someone with a conscience in UMNO. We need more Muhammad Taib's, Rahim Chik's and Tajuddin Abdul Rahman's.

We can and are doing what we want

Khalwat extraordinaire has got enough nominations for the UMNO vice-presidency. Ya. Strike one against the Malaysian public. We Umno are an elite, special species.

With our millions and many wives, who cares if one of use screwed and underage girls and someone else when to prison for it? We can do what we want and always have. We, UMNO gave this country independence. We were at the beaches, repelling both the Japanese and the British when they came back in hand to hand combat. We were hiding behind the coconut trees, shooting at all those penjajah.

We are the masters. So what if one of us likes underaged girls and extra-marital sex. He is still fit to be an UMNO vice-presidential candidate and we voted thus. He is already  a Supreme Council member after all. In UMNO no crime is punishable. Come join us and get immunity from your actions

Abdul Rahim Qualifies For Umno Vice President Contest

SEREMBAN, Dec 27 (Bernama) -- Umno supreme council member Tan Sri Abdul Rahim Thamby Chik has qualified to contest the post of vice-president in the Umno elections next March.

He picked up his 20th nomination when the Seremban Umno Division nominated him as one of the three candidates to contest the three posts of vice-president, at its annual meeting today.

The division also nominated former vice-president Tan Sri Mohd Isa Abdul Samad and Foreign Minister Datuk Seri Dr Rais Yatim for vice-president. It had nominated Umno deputy president Datuk Seri Najib Tun Razak for president and vice-president Tan Sri Muhyiddin Yassim for deputy president.

With the qualification, Abdul Rahim joins eight other candidates in the contest for the three posts of vice-president. The others are Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Tun Hussein, Rais, Datuk Seri Syed Hamid Albar, Datuk Seri Mohamed Khaled Nordin, Datuk Seri Mohd Shafie Apdal, Datuk Seri Dr Ahmad Zahid Hamidi, Mohd Isa and Datuk Seri Dr Jamaluddin Jarjis.

Asked for his comments, Abdul Rahim said he was thankful to Allah (God) for having been able to secure the sufficient number of nominations and thanked the Seremban as well as the other Umno divisions which had nominated him.

The Seremban Umno Division annual meeting was held today after it was postponed from Nov 9 following a dispute.

-- BERNAMA

Pro - ISA

ISA is good.

It makes people respect the government. And even love the govt. Look at Pairin these days. He's a good dog. He know we can take away whetever we give him.

ISA is only used on those that deserve it. Normal citizens need not fear.

Why fear? UMNO knows how to use the ISA (after all only an UMNO member will ever be Prime Minister and the Home Minister). Trust UMNO. It knows what is good for you.

So what if ISA is most often used on political opponents. They are threathening UMNO/BN and therefore the country.

After all in 1987, if we did not use the ISA to throw those 106 people in Kamunting, those Chinese Schools would have declared their independence from Malaysia. Imagine hundreds of mini-singapore's in Malaysia. No way we could allow that.

And Sabah would have seceeded from us it we did not use it. Look at Pairin and Maximus now, so pro-Malaysia. Without the lesson learned from the ISA they would still be trying to break the Malaysian Federation.

And in 1998, we used it against Anwar. Of course we had to . Here was a liberal, jewish financed, manchurian candidate, homosexual, neo-conservative/liberal whose street protest was a threat to stability. Who were these people protesting? Just unemployed people payed by the US.

US is alway trying to take over our country. It's very jealous of us. We have everything it doesn't.

And don't forget Singapore. Always trying to use the chinese in Malaysia to conquer us. How we don't know, but we know it wants to.

Special Branch is also good. Always harassing the kataks so they don't cross-over.

People try to be funny we ISA or FRU or Special Branch them, then they know.

Don't main-main with UMNO. We don't like you, we FRU you

Race Traitors and 1 hero

There are some people who are simply race traitors. Who simply hate their own race for some reason and talk crap about it. Bangsa, Agama and Negara in that order lah. Not Negara first, then Agama and Bangsa. Bangsa always first.

List of traitors

1. ANWAR IBRAHIM

Hai, is there I actually have to say to this guy who wanted to sell us to the IMF? Like's the backside too, so it seems.

Keep's saying Anak Cina, anak Kita, anak India, anak kita, anak Melayu, anak kita.

My Ass/Arse, only anak melayu is anak kita, anak UMNO, the rest are anak DAP, Anak PAS and Anak MIC. No way Anak Saya or anak Malaysia. Only Anak BN is Anak Malaysia.

2. ZAID IBRAHIM

Useless guy, wants to take away the power to appoint the Chief Justice from UMNO/the PM? No way! UMNO must control all the powers of government. Why should we have an independent Chief Justice if he might rule against UMNO or UMNO members interest? How dare Zaid criticise Ketuanan Melayu?

I might not need any money from the govt, but if they are giving it to me, no one is going to say I don't have a right to it. Fuck you Zaid, no way you are going to take away my right to charge the govt a 200% mark-up and get my cut for projects.

And against the ISA? How can we arrest political opponents otherwise?

Give democracy to the people? No way, democracy belongs only to UMNO.

Bangsa, Agama dan Negara forever.

Thank God he has been sacked from UMNO.

3. Tengku Razaleigh

This old man is also pretty useless, always talking about reforming UMNO, giving each member one vote each. No way, only the guy in power should be able to decide who should be leaders. We can't let the ulu kampung UMNO members to decide on who leads them. They must follow what we say, not the other way around. Democratise UMNO, get rid of money politics?! Then how to bind people to us? If their own self interest is not bound to us, then why would they vote and finance us? Does Ku Li even know what he is talking about?

Both these guys should just shut up. They already made their money, so shut up and enjoy your retirement.

Heroes List

1. Mahathir

This dude is the man. he shots at everyone. No quarter. The past, Pfft, he makes the past into his own reality that everyone has to bend around it.

82 years old, hair still so black, so active, tembak everyone. Damm, getting a hard on thinking of this Wira Melayu who kicked the British out single handedly, saved us from the clutches of Singapore who wanted to colonise us. kicked that cina-pek who can't speak proper Malay still, Kit Siang in the butt (ISA is the best!) and saved us from our many-many enemies in and outside the country. People are trying to take over Malaysia all the time. The US with/and/or Israel wants to take over us externally and internally the DAP and their 10,000 members also want to take over the country too. Don't forget that homosexual, commie jew lover Anwar who wants to ruin the country by becoming PM (not sure how he will ruin the country but he definitely will).

This wira saved us from all of this and gave us Proton Saga too. Even though I use a BMW myself (and have to pay 3 times the actual price because of tariffs, wish I was connected enough to get an AP), I heard the Proton is an excellent car and that Proton under Tun was about to become one Asia's top car companies but that Badawi when he took over, he ruined it and spoiled everything.

Badawi, in 5 years he did nothing and everything fell down. All the strong foundations Mahathir built on such strong ground and with such strong roots all needed the love, leadership and watering that Badawi did not give. What lah Badawi, if you don't direct the judiciary and instruct all the UMNO politicians, they will start thinking they can do what they want, and that their mandate is to the people and not to UMNO.

What UMNO gives, UMNO can take away........

The Ideal Super UMNO candidate

This is the ideal Super UMNO candidate. No quarter given or asked.

If we had 100 Tajuddin's as MP's , Pakatan would have been beaten out of parliament. (albeit from fist fights occurring out of parliament)

This is war and Tajuddin is a Super UMNO warrior (a six million dollar warrior, but still a warrior) .

He is the best of us. Look at the Parliament Speaker, he can't even censure him.  Minta tolong!? Yo, Speaker, go wipe Pakatan's ass.

He must be one of the world's best parliamentarians.

How we are insidioulsy undermining PKR

So PKR is trying to be all professional now. They hired a media company to do a logo design for their recent congress. Instead of asking for a proposal, they gave it to a "friend". Well a Super UMNO member in this organisation worked on it and successfully sabotaged it. Look at it below.

It looks like the footprints of a cicak. When people look at it, what are they supposed to think?

And of course look at the PKR logo (self-inflicted, Super UMNO did not sabotage this). Looks like an evil eye, what it's supposed to mean? Not demon-eyes is it?

We are imprinting a subconscious message at anyone who looks at the PKR Congress logo, that they are the everywhere crap logo cicak party!

PAS Selangor's strategic thrust at UMNO fails

Lucky!, Here was PAS trying to make it harder for alcohol to be sold in Selangor. But it failed thanks to the Cina-Geng.

If it was difficult to get alcohol, our supply of Mat Rempit's for various event would have been severely curtailed. Imagine who would turn out at our protest without our friendly Mat Rempit's. It's bad enough that no one turns up to our ceramah's anymore.

But ......Ha! Ha! KL is a federal territory, so we can drink and get alcohol and do what we want in KL! UMNO Rules! Even is every state govt. falls, Putrajaya and KL is ours (who cares about Labuan?) as long as we control the federal govt.

Join Super UMNO - Special offer

The first 10 member of Super UMNO will get free satay! For Life! Now is that a tempting offer or what?!

And the first 50 members won't have to do this

"Just after the general election in March, a clutch of Umno MPs stopped a minister along the Parliament lobby, badgering and threatening him. Their bone of contention: their multimillion ringgit projects and contracts had not been approved."

We guarantee them contracts for 2 generations! Just ask your subcontractors to build roads with the shoddiest material possible everytime and we will give you a contract to "maintain" the road for 70 years!

Our biggest coup was to get Tun Dr. M to join Super UMNO after he left UMNO but he wanted to be Super UMNO member NO.1 but that was taken. So we left amicable, but not before he threatened to chop my head off (or was that Pak Lah?)

One day soon I will reveal who were members No. 0 and our super secret member -1.

We control everything, get used to it

Katanya, pegawai-pegawai Kemas, Jabatan Pelajaran dan jabatan khas Kementerian Penerangan memberi tekanan dan ugutan supaya cawangan-cawangan tidak mencalonkan Zaid."Ada guru yang mengadu mereka akan dikenakan tindakan jika mencalonkan Zaid untuk jawatan ketua bahagian."Manakala Kemas pula akan menghentikan bantuan kepada cawangan yang mencalonkan Zaid," katanya.

We control the vertical, we control the horizontal, we control everything.

The air you breathe? We give it to you. If we wanted, we would chop everything, giving logging contracts to our "kawan-kawan" and put Malaysia in a permanent haze, but we are kind hearted, we need to breathe too.

Your water? We privatize lah and get our cut, but still cheap what.

Your roads? You pay car tax. We create toll roads, pass sub-contracts to everyone and keep tolling people till they die!

You can't beat us, so Join us (subject to terms and conditions, native Malay speakers only) at Super UMNO.

Pension, EPF? Invested in "strategic projects" of national importance. Good for the country right, so good for you. Also invested in Valuecap to prop up the stock market. This good also what? EPF has so much shares in the stock market, it might as well help to prop it. Virtuous circle right? everyone wins. He! He!

Kemas, AJKK, whatever, this is the party that has it all, and we are one step better.

Super UMNO

Mike Tyson is my Hero

If I was a girl I would be his second (or third?) wife.

This is called trickle down economics. Spreading the wealth around.

Mike Tyson should quit UMNO and become the President of Super UMNO! 

Only he would have the balls to carry 2.4m into Australia (has he not heard of money transfer?) and then say he can't speak English.

Ha

 Sabah Umno MP, who declined to be named, told The Malaysian Insider of how one "agent" of a party election candidate recently toured the state's interior just before the close of nominations to drum up support.

"This man went round offering government contracts to the rural folk in return for nominating his man," he said.

He claimed the "agent" was a government officer (a civil servant!) who worked for a federal minister. The contracts being offered included deals to repair bridges and community halls.

Each contract was worth approximately RM10,000. That was how much a nomination was worth.

Muhammad, who is also Rural Development Minister, was forced to answer accusations in Parliament from his own Barisan Nasional (BN) and Umno colleagues that his special officer had been sent to campaign for him in Sabah.

Last Monday, Datuk Seri Abdul Ghapur Salleh, Umno's Kalabakan MP and Raime Unggi, the Umno MP for Tenom, had complained in Parliament to Muhammad about the presence of the minister's special officer during the Umno divisional elections.

Datuk Anifah Aman, the leader of Sabah Umno MPs, said the special officer "had used his position to campaign for the minister."

"There is no use wasting government and public funds to campaign for the minister's interest and not for the people's interest," he told the minister to applause from his fellow lawmakers.

The people? UMNO is the people! We have 3 million members! So what we do for them is good for them and the country.

If we don't give contract what is the reason for People to join UMNO?

Hey people if you join Super UMNO, we will give you a perpetual guaranteed contract. You vote for me all the time, you always get contract.

Join Super UMNO today!

Mukhriz is an Honarary Super UMNO member, RESPECT!

But the idea that the BN needs to reform or that there needs to be change in the political balance does not meet with Umno Youth exco Datuk Mukhriz Mahathir's approval.

Mukhriz, for instance, is firm in his belief that there is no real need for changes in the BN format, 

Right, why should UMNO change? Everyone else should change. We represent the majority, you lost your support, so you change lah.

In the Super UMNO party we will make sure pendatang parties like MIC and MCA know their place.

Ali Rustam is not Super UMNO material

So Ali Rustam wants to

Umno vice-president Mohd Ali Rustam once again reiterated that the party must take control of the government to ensure Umno policies, especially the New Economic Policy (NEP), are being implemented effectively at all levels across the nation.

What lah, Ali, what kind of UMNO member are you, we already control the govt. Why you so bodoh?! I think you need to be replaced by a Super UMNO candidate in Melaka so that we can control the state govt. there. Obviously you are not doing that if you don't think UMNO doesn't already control all aspects of the federal govt. What you think we have been doing for 51 years? Simply shaking legs and letting civil servants be impartial? Where got lah. Let me hit your head so you wake up from dream land.

"So it's only proper for the party to control the government to implement policies, action plans and reforms desired by the masses.

Corect! Correct! Correct!

You might agree with the Super UMNO plan. All important positions will be appointed! Head of GLC's judiciary, police, everything and they will exclusively be Super UMNO members

Super UMNO

I am fed up with UMNO. They simply aren't UMNO enough!

They are not defending my interest at all. Just giving in all the time

I am forming a new party, Super UMNO.

Criteria for Membership

1. Must speak Malay in public and English in private, in interviews and when speaking to the press

2. Must have cosmopolitan friends in private only

3. Must be educated in Britain

4. Must hobnob with the rich of all races in private but be a Tuan in public (preferably with Keris)

5. Must have an apartment/home in London

6. Must know how to reward people who vote for you

Criteria can be expanded or changed at any time

Voting for the ~President

Very easy, each state will choose one delegate.

Those 13 delegates will then choose the President of the Super UMNO party.

Simply! No need of one member one vote. And the Supreme Council (comprising these 13 people) can also postpone Super UMNO elections indefinitely so member don't need to attend boring meeting and have pesky elections to vote for. Just leave it to the leadership, we know best.